Navigating the Holidays: Tips for Divorced and Divorcing Women

The holiday season, while festive and joyous for many, can present unique challenges for women navigating a divorce. The emotional and financial complexities of separation are magnified during this time, making it crucial to approach the season with preparation and mindfulness.

Here are some practical financial and co-parenting tips to help you stay focused and grounded.

Financial Best Practices

Get Your Ducks in a Row

Start by organizing your financial life.

• Secure access to accounts: Make sure you have passwords for all online banking and brokerage accounts.
• Copy key documents: Year-end statements are particularly valuable, as they detail annual transactions. Tax documents start arriving in January, so keep track of these as well.
• Consult a professional: A financial planner or Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) can help you strategize effectively.

Moderation is Key

The holidays often bring added pressure to overspend on gifts, entertainment, and travel. Resist the urge to splurge:

• Focus on essentials and defer large purchases, if possible.
• Maintain steady cash flow to handle unexpected divorce-related expenses or legal fees.

Mind Your Joint Accounts

If you and your ex still share joint accounts or credit cards, monitor them closely to avoid surprises.

• Discuss with your attorney how to protect your assets and prevent unapproved holiday spending by your ex.

Slow Down Decision-Making

• The holiday rush can cloud judgment. Give yourself time to evaluate major decisions.
• IRA transfers and QDROs (Qualified Domestic Relations Orders) for retirement assets are critical tasks—don’t delay these processes.
• Use this period to reevaluate your financial situation, particularly in light of holiday spending and upcoming vacations.

Protect Your Credit

If refinancing or obtaining a new mortgage is in your future, safeguard your credit by ensuring no payments are missed. January is an excellent time to consult lenders before the spring rush in the housing market.

Co-Parenting Tips

Embrace Excellent Communication

Clear communication minimizes stress and ensures smoother holidays for everyone involved. Apps like OurFamilyWizard can facilitate this.

Flexibility is Key

• Multiple celebrations: Frame multiple holiday gatherings as a bonus for your children.
• Adapt exchange times: Flexibility helps ease scheduling conflicts.

Encourage Positivity

• Help your children select a gift for the other parent to foster goodwill.
• Show support for their time spent at the other parent’s house and encourage them to have fun.

Focus on Yourself

Make plans for your own enjoyment while your children are away. Kids want to see their parents happy, so prioritize self-care.

Create New Traditions

Lean into the opportunity to build new traditions that reflect your changing family dynamic. Whether it’s baking cookies, hosting a movie marathon, or taking a winter hike, new rituals can bring joy and healing.

For more detailed insights and practical advice, be sure to watch the New Beginnings: Empowering Women Through Divorce video from our recent webinar.

Finding Peace and Joy During the Holidays After Divorce

Navigating the holidays during or after a divorce isn’t easy, but with intentional planning and a proactive mindset, it can still be a meaningful time. Prioritize your financial stability, nurture your emotional well-being, and embrace the opportunity to create fresh, positive traditions for the future.

If you’d like to evaluate your financial situation and plan for the future, we offer a complimentary consultation to help you get started.